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After traveling to over 30 states in the past few years, I’ve come to believe that Long Island uniquely exemplifies everything that’s wrong with this country.

The exorbitant costs of living, the utterly corrupt police departments, the pothole riddled streets, a populace with disturbingly schizophrenic leanings, the high taxation, the list goes on and on. I thought it was just me, but my mother told me her experience had been the same when she was a child, having been a former NYC native before moving further out east to Suffolk County, and recalling how utterly bewildered she was as well by Long Islanders’ neurotic behavior.

We have no fast lanes here, even when traffic is light, because there are always slow pokes cluttering up the roads and threatening the safety of everyone by literally driving BELOW the minimum speeds on parkways.

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while her father filmed the whole thing from the front seat.

It wasn’t just my mother and me who noticed the peculiar behavior of the natives.

Anyone I spoke to that was from out of town made the same observations: “Man, people are crazy here.

And even if Long Island wasn’t a traffic nightmare, there’s really no place for me to go. There’s very little to distinguish one town/village from the next, and because of that there’s very little sense of community too.

Instead, we have micro-cliques that either have their roots in childhood or are borne out of living in the same neighborhood for many years.