You can be that crazy dude who lives under a bridge and rides a bicycle with garbage bags full of tin cans hanging off the back, but as long as you’re “Japanese,” you’re good to go. Afterwards, I go to a bar, and every week, sure as hell, someone will approach me and say, “Wow, let’s speak English together! People are massively impacted by their environment and the people around them. The place was packed full of about thirty guys and gals in dark suits all sitting alone in silence, eating and reading manga or staring at their smartphones with glazed eyes.
But Japanese racism is a whole other subject.) Now, I’m in no way saying that the majority of men and women participate in this, but the fact that the institution exists changes the social dynamic. ” Now, I may even want to, but really, who gives away what they can sell? So prostitution has turned sex in Japan into a commodity. I stayed for about an hour and a half, ate some grilled mackerel and rice and miso soup, drank an Asahi beer, and watched TV. The only person I talked with was the waitress, which is pretty typical.
Anyone who’s been in Japan for even a short while has seen the rows of shops offering all the usual services. I’ve lived in my current apartment building for, let’s see, about a year and a half now. Anyway, in that time the number of neighbors I’ve met is . Okay, so here’s a little quiz for you, to see how well you know Japanese culture: I figured I’d break the ice with a non-threatening situational observation, so I said in Japanese: “Yeah, another busy morning, huh? But for two Japanese people to strike up a conversation while in line at the grocery store? It’s a tad dingy and run-down, but the food’s solid.
(As an aside, I’ll add that “foreigners” aren’t allowed in. Every week, people pay me to sit in Starbucks and simply talk with them. Well, it’s hypothetically possible, I suppose, like Dark Matter or something. That means that if everyone else is having an awesome, sexy time, you’re more likely to as well. When it’s a sunny day, everybody’s happy, and when it rains, everybody’s glum. So I was talking this over with my colleague Fujimoto-sensei last week, and he said, “Ah, Ken, you should have seen it in the 90’s. Everybody was making money, people were positive, it was more fun. Then, “You know I used to have a wife and a girlfriend in those days. I think of it like an extra living room, which helps since my apartment’s so darn small.
They’re not afraid of showing their feelings in public or telling their girls flat out how they feel about them. The extreme version of this is known as “gaijin hunter” and some will do everything for the sake of having one of those adorable “half”-kids (half Western, half Japanese) just to toss their foreign guy later on.
For foreign women it’s a completely different story.
However, be warned: If you want to read about bragging stories of all those Western guys who get laid a hundred times per day, then you came to the wrong place. You certainly won’t find that here – and not from a foreign girl like me!
And at the same time there’s only a very tiny number of foreign (read: non-Asian) women with Japanese men next to them. Maybe that’s a secret we’ll never quite get, but there are many theories!
Things that they fear a foreign woman would not agree to do (e.g.
Okay, so the internet’s never been famous for politeness. A more typical case is probably my former student Masahiro, who’s an executive at a famous beverage manufacturer. until to midnight, six days a week, with a 15-minute lunch break at his desk.
On the other hand, if you post: Japan sucks and I’m not having any sex. This rather banal discussion recently took a turn for the interesting, however, after the Japan Family Planning Association reported that 45% of young Japanese women, and over 25% of men, “were not interested in or despised sexual contact.” followed this with a piece entitled Why have young people in Japan stopped having sex? After living in Japan for a few years, this actually makes sense to me. I’m just some dude in Japan who tries to find a clean pair of socks so he can put one on and run to the station to cram onto the train with ten thousand of the unhappiest Japanese people you’ve ever seen. He has Sunday off, which is when he studies English.
Again, this is a hard thing to reconcile if you don’t live in Japan, but being in a relationship and having sex have precious little to do with one another. The fact is, you don’t challenge what you’re told, you don’t offer up original ideas, and you don’t initiate conversation with strangers. I actually rode the elevator down with a guy yesterday. Japanese people excel at social interactions when there are clearly defined roles: Boss and Worker, Clerk and Customer, Drunk Salaryman and Gaijin.
For a Japanese male, it’s possible to get sex almost anywhere, at any time, for little more than the price of a decent lunch. [*Note to self: insert more nuanced term before posting this.] The society functions with robot-like efficiency because your boss tells you what do—or your parents, or your teacher—and you do it. If you work in a ramen shop, you don’t say, “Hey boss, how about if, instead of two pieces of pork in the noodles, we tried ? Which presents a koan-like riddle: If you don’t talk to people you don’t know, how do you get to know people? He was about my age and was tying his tie while I was still fumbling into my shoes. “Oh jeez, I can’t believe my alarm didn’t go off.” C. There are clear rules and precedents for those situations. “I think we’re in a recession.” So then after work, I went to my usual , which is basically like a cheap restaurant.